years old.. and I am still trying to wear that number and make it fit properly! Right now it feels kinda like it belongs to someone else.
Nope I did not have all the negative emotions that come with the big 30. I guess I had been thinking about it for a long while so that day just kinda came and went with a little family dinner and best of all, both my folks called to wish me a good day and that made my heart all warm and squishy!
I have said this before and I say it again. I hope that the new year will bring better stuff than this year has. The relocation to Denmark has been among my greatest life challenges ever and as I complete my 10th month here I admit it has gotten much better. I have accepted certain things about being here and let go of certain things. The hardest part for me was dealing with the feeling and belief that I had deferred my hopes for too long and was again being forced to do so and not only that, but also being forced to piece together my shattered dreams and start creating new dreams and hopes. That ladies and gentlemen is what almost broke me!
However as the new year begins, I have a few good things to look forward to. The new apartment! (yes! hooray we are moving from the boondoos into the Ghetto!) I kid you not, we so are! but rather Ghetto than boondoos! The biggest is the new baby due very soon. Motherhood is upon me and I now have a true understanding about why the whole process takes 9 months. I have been oscillating between extreme terror to little terror. However I am way past the point of no return so here we go. Wish me luck!
So my turning 30 is not such a bad thing. I may not have a career or money of my own (that still is a biggy for me. The whole kept woman thing has never appealed!), but I have a man who loves loves me, a family that loves me, a baby of my own to love, and after 10 months, a place of my own! I know not what the new year holds for me but I can look forward to these few things.
PS. anyone know where I can get a tall/high bed, I refuse to sleep in a cheap low bed, plays havoc with the back!