Allow me to yap about this one more time.
I find myself at some kind of cross roads and I am a little afraid/scared. I have been looking forward to 2008 because it meant that finally I could start getting on with THIS part of MY life. Baby started day care, so I have a few hours to myself everyday.
The big question now is WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE. More importantly, THIS TIME ROUND I MUST GET IT RIGHT and that freaks me out. It scares me that in my attempts to get it right I may get it wrong -i mean I did it once before eih!.
10 years ago when I started my degree at Makerere, I knew it was a pointless degree. We called them flat courses those days. But I went ahead and did it because I was too afraid and ignorant to look at other options. Repeating Form 6 was out of the questions because I knew and know that I did my best. Three years later, I was doing admin jobs and landed one which exposed me to business management and thus my decision to do a masters in Business. After that I begun building my career in the UK. I started from SCRATCH and slowly made my way up. But all in all it was still ADMIN work… allbeit in the end I was doing HR work which I kinda landed by chance and was intending to use it as a launch pad into the world of high business- finally the opportunity to use my degree.
2 years later, I have looked at my situation from every possible angle. I have tried to be as realistic as possible (while keeping my innate pessimism in check: not an easy fit if you know me). I come to the realisation that I am going to have to retrain. I do not have a UNIQUE skill set. I am in a new environment requiring a different language and thus CHANGE is required.
This time round I have decided I must acquire a skill set that is NICHE, UNIVERSAL and SPECIALIZED. I can no longer do stuff just for the money, otherwise few years down the road I will be in the same place. I have to get it right. The task at hand looks insumoutable and so far away. I know that journey of a thousand steps begins with one.
My first step is mastering the language. Hopefully at the end of it all I will have found out what I want to do with my career life.
But I gotta say … I HATE THIS. I hate having to start all over again. Yes yes yes I should look at it as an opportunity and that is where I am shifting my focus.
Wish me luck………just a small question… what should I do?? lol (that is how bad it is. 😦