A few things about me

Archive for November, 2009

Yesterday and Today

Don’t know if I mentioned this to you guys, but I am contracted to work 3 days a week (23hrs), but sometimes due to employee leave, sickness and plain old extra work, I get asked to come into work the other 2 days. The past 3 weeks I have worked all week and I have been exhausted. So this week when asked if I could come in, I was like no, no, no :-). Come December I am planning on working full working weeks.. God help!

Yesterday:

I cleaned the house, juu chini (from top to bottom). We are still only using 4 rooms in the house; living room, study, kitchen and utility room. The rest is still inaccessible due to the bathroom renovations which is about 5 days away from completion. yipee! I plan on taking 2 days off to clean .. anyway who knows, might not be able to get those two days off.

We had a windstorm last night. Throughout the country 47 trees went down. Our roof leaked. I had to call in the roof people. Called 4 companies, got lucky with the 4th. He came out immediately by then Big Al was home and did all the talking. We got to go up on the roof. Fun fun. Our roof is flat topped. He repaired it and talked us through it’s maintenance which was very appreciated by Big Al and I. He assured us the roof is in perfect order.. the leak was due to water coming in through the chimney, collecting in the beams and leaking onto my new carpet. We swept the roof clear of the water . Very pleased about some tips for the future work to be done. Some exposed beams have rot …..but that’s for sometime early next year.

Cooked oven chips, chicken fillets, tomatoes, cucumber and rucolar salad for supper. It went down well. Before that did two loads of laundry.  Put Nikh to bed at 9.00p and fell asleep myself which was not in the plan as Big Al and I had a date to watch “House”.

Today:

Woke up full of engery feeling high. On the way out to drop Nikh at daycare, the last of the capentry work for the bathrooms was delivered. Got back home Big Al was on his way off to work, he picked the mail.. hey presto, big ass bill for the temporary toilet we are currently using. We agreed not to let it bog us down. Tidied the house, did 2 loads of laundry, baked a cake, went running 5.5kms or thereabouts. Washed my hair, had a shower, fried turkey breasts for tonight´s supper, ironed mine and baby’s clothes for tomorrow. Made another cake for a collegue at work. I promised him on Tuesday that I would do so. At work all the foreigners sit together during lunch. All the Thai chicks and 2 guys sit together, then the rest of us, Iran, Iraq, Uganda, Ghana, Burma and Afghanistan sit together.  So we kinda bring stuff for one another during lunch break. That is our longest break; 25mins.

It’s now 15.03. I leave the house at 15:10 to pick Nikh. The hours go by so fast. I had planned on going to town for myself and do some windowshopping.But after a quick consult with my bank account all plans of going into town were nixed.

Big Al is coming home late tonight. So it’s just me and baby. Everything is done and ready for tomorrow as well as for supper. So when he gets home we will play and watch tv.

Gotta run. It’s cold gray and ugly outside. I usually use the bike when I go pick him up.

I finally found the camera, now I have to find out how to charge it, then I will start taking pictures.

have a fun day wherever you are.

Kisses!

 

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Girl or boy that you are

On a lighter note, I have also been working on this post in my head. The post is inspired by a youtube-er I watch. She has a segment she calls “Every Diva should have”.  I will further add “every diva/divo should have”. What she does is show case what she thinks every diva should have. It’s all done in a sprit of fun and laughter and I like.

It got me thinking, “what kind of girl am I”.  I have never been seriously into clothes and fashion, but, but I think I am finally figuring out my sense of style. At 32 imagine that, but I think I am figuring it out. I have never been a girly girly girl. I am more of a “comfort girl”. All things comfy is me. Hence, I do not own a pair of heels, but I did get some boots with a 2 inch heel and they were killing me the first week, lakini I am getting the hang of them.

So what kind of girl am I? As in what do your friends, collegues and family know you for.  After careful thought I came to the conclusion I am an earrings-kinda-girl. I have recieved comments at work about my earings, apparently people notice that I change them a lot. I do not do big, flashy dangling stuff. I do studs, small danglers and own two pairs of hoops, small ones. The silver pair, I bought in Ug while still at University and the gold ones I got for my 30th birthday from Big Al at my request. Other than that, I have lots of “African earings” that I usually buy when I get home, in almost every color. When I got Nikh, I did not wear danglers for a long time, because little babies like dangling things and will pull at your ears. I have about 3 pairs of studs. My oldest being some 8 carat gold earings that I got when In high school, from downtown Kampala.

So what are you known for, it could be bangles, handbags, shoes, hair sytles.. do tell

 

gotta run

True life Hero?…think not

When we moved in about 4 weeks ago, the cable TV connection for the previous owners had not yet been disconnected. Suddenly after 9 months without cable tv, we had cable. Yippee. It lasted 2 days and with a quickness it was disconnected. Hubby punched the numbers and realised we could afford it until the end of this year given the ridiculous offer the cable company was giving. Will we have it next year.. don’t think so. After 9 months without it, we don’t miss it, we don’t watch it much…. but lets wait and see.

With that introduction I will delve into the purpose of this post. There is a lot on my mind, a whole lot and I once did a post about it and deleted it the next morning. I checked my blog stats and realised 2 people had read it. Ouch! I was upset that night, the feelings were honest but presented harshly, crudely with underlying anger and frustration.

Today I think I am ready to present it “properly”. But first about cable tv.  As I type, CNN Heroes has just ended. I could not help but think that even though CNN is the messenger and distributor of all news bad, once in a while they carry good news and it touches my soul.  CNN Heroes in one of them and every time I see it, I am left feeling helpless and useless. Useless that at 32 my circle of influence and helping others had not reached out beyond my nuclear family. That only once in a while I will help my extended family but even that is not a given. And it all comes to money.

I feel an enromous amount of guilt that I am not able to sustain a regular monthy allowance to my mum. There I said it. It eats me alive.  I should be able to, I mean, people hear that I have bought a house and I am having renovations done, so how come you cannot send money every month. It bothers me a lot. Sometimes it depresses me to the point I don’t want to call home because then I don’t have to deal with knowing that things are tough and I have not made a contribution. I have no excues except to say, I sometimes do not have enough to go around. It’s as simple as that and yet so complicated. 

So when I see CNN Heroes or read about people doing such wonderful things for others, I look at myself and think, how can I even think of others when those in my own back yard still lack.

I understand it is about giving what you can and when you can. And so it continues. I look forward to next month. I have worked more hours this month, so there should be something left over.  Like I said, when I can, I do, when I can’t I don’t and that’s just how it is.  The tough part is  living with that.

what to do? to do what

I want to be a hero and that was part of the dream that I lost a long time not so long ago.

There are many thoughts on this issue in my head. I will bullet them

  • African equivalent of welfare system. We support each other
  • Dependency and the burden it places on the person depended on
  • Duty giving or love giving
  • Expectation and payback/giving back
  • Ensuing distance and resentment btw giver and reciever.

discuss.

Just a Band

Archer once blogged about these guys, that’s how I got to know about them. First time round I was not feeling thier songs but this one, oh la la baby. Just touches me in all the mushy places of my soul. It’s a sweet sweet song and the video is totally plus. Reminds me of  Freshly Ground’s Pot Belly love

Watch, enjoy and support

I am over at Youtube watching music videos, having my own little disco party.

Oh and if you have not been by YayeMarie’s you all need to stop by. She has some lovely stuff going on there.

Just finished

I just finished reading The Memory Keeper’s Daughter  by Kim Edwards.  I picked it up at our local library in the new town we have moved to. I was starved for some English books, cause i have not read anything new in like 3 weeks and I was going through withdrawal symptoms. The English section of the library is pitiful, but I found this gem.

I found the language a tad verbose , too flowery and  overly descriptive. Some sentences were unnecessarily long but the story did grab me from the very begining and I just had to finish it. Unlike some books, I did not read it word for word and found myself scheming through some pages.

What touched me about this book is the author skill at depicting how distance between two people grows and how human beings can sometimes fail to “see” one another especially  in supposedly “intimate” relationships. How in our misguided love for others we can do one thing or things that create even more distance and kill a relationship. How we can do something so wrong and yet at the core of us not be evil in anyway. How the truth, no matter how hard it is, is always the best way forward, always.

Now I gotta go cook and shake off the feeling of this book. It was a tad heavy, emotionally that is.

Have a truthful day. Resolve in yourself today to always tell the truth. Trust me, it is hard hard hard, but by God, the saying is true, it does set you free. Remember every decision you ever make has a consequence , so why not start out with the truth, no matter how ugly it is.

Snapps all around.

Woes on the Job

For the past two weeks I have been posted at another hospital washing beds and  making beds. I HATE MY JOB. With that out of the way let me proceed.

It’s 06:22 in the morning. I am showered dressed and ready to leave the house. I have had the car since my commute is a little longer and without the car I would not be able to pick Nikh on time from the day care lady. Big Al cycles him to daycare then gets the bus into work. I pick him up in the afternoon. It’s working fine for now. I hate that washing bed thing so much, more than my usual gig which is ironing and folding clothes. At the other place I have my pals, we get a long, there’s lots of people. Here, I work with three other people and they are fine and all.. we just don’t blend, a lack of chemisty.

One of the guys keeps pulling or touch his penis. It is so disgusting and unsightly. And because he keeps using his forefinger and thumb I can’t help thinking “kwani how small is it” 🙂 . He keeps adjusting it or them, me I don’t know and it just ugh! yuck! I feel like yelling, keep your hands away from your crotch or do it in private. Or maybe his underpants are tight. Gross!

The other guy is a thug. Walks like one, talks like one, has the air of one. He is the kind of guy I do not want to meet alone. I swear he looks like those rightwing, “keep Denmark white” , I hate all non-white people thugs. We do not talk, he does not talk to me, I do not talk. I can’t even look at  him. He just creeps me out totally.

His mother is my supervisor.. would you believe that. She asked me if I like this new gig, I was like, I would rather go back to my other place. She was not expecting that response and I could see she was taken aback.  I am through with lying to make people feel comfortable. So later she comes back saying, it’s because you don’t smoke and because there are not so many “foreigners” working here as opposed to the other place. I was like “whatever”. Then the ball grabber had been giving me orders and directions all the time. “you gotta straighten out the edeges of the sheet, this is how you do it, blah blah blah, good job, now you just have to be faster.. ” Yesterday I told him off. He started on his orders and I said in my nice polite way with a smile “you’re irritating me with your orders. I know what I am doing and if you want it perfect then stop asking me to worker faster. I have been here 1 week, 3 days. You have been here over a year, lay off with the orders” He was taken aback too. Started saying stuff about just wanted things to look good blah blah blah, I wanted to rid him of his balls. Idiot!

Back from work and continuing this post at 16:00 (Big Al and Nikh are out in town bonding, the roast is in the oven, pototoes await peeling, usual back from work housework awaits.. but I’ll get to that when I am done here)

Yesterday’s word of the day was VUMILIA (persevere). As I worked the only thing I could think was  “I am slowly dying here, I need to get out of this place, I will die in my soul if I keep doing this, I cannot take this any longer”  So that was clear, then I asked myself  “ok then , so you quit your  job then what? What are the alternatives? I came up blank. Job hunting is totally out of the question.

I resolved in myself that I never ever want to be employed by anyone ever again. Me going to work for someone, me begging or hunting for a job is not in the cards. I DON’T WANT TO. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH. So I have been working on something, something that is so long from fruition, I loose hope and I gain hope, all the while working and strategising towards this thing that I am planning on doing. I am scared out of my bones, but fuck that, I tried the employment thing, and it ain’t cutting it, so I’m going to try this other thing and see what happens. It fails, it fails, at least I tried.

So if I am not job hunting and if my other thing is not off ground then what, sit at home and be bored, poor and upset… hence “VUMILIA mama! just a little longer sweets, you have a lot on your plate right now, get that out of the way then get cracking

Today’s word of the day has been “count your blessings” and that I did on my ride to work, aloud in the car, like a mad woman beating away at the blues that want to make home in my mind.

That which has brought the hate for my job into focus is working with these new guys. Honest to God, there is nothing wrong with them at all, apart from what I said about, it’s just that we don’t gel and already I hate what I do, now add lack of chemistry and hey presto. But I am a fly chick, hot chick, tough chick. Tomorrow is my last day. Even if they beg and cry there is no way I am staying there next week. I want back at my other boring mundane job. At least I get to laugh and see my buddies.

So if you are having a tough ride at the moment, VUMILIA. It never ever last forever. That’s the beauty of life, nothing is static, everything changes in time and with time. It’s just a matter of time.

Kisses folks.